Tuesday, February 16, 2010


I'm sick of consistently being let down by my so called "best friends." I've completely lost contact with one and the other is on her way as well. I don't know if it's me or if it's mutual or just them. The one I lost contact with is not really a loss in my eyes actually it's kind of a relief. When I go to my friends with a problem it would be nice if they listened to me as I do for them on countless occasions...if I'm in a huge fight with my sister or mother I'm not in the mood to hear all about your fabulous night to the city with your new friends. I came to you for a reason...most likely because I trust you or I think you can give me good advice. Well with this friend I was clearly mistaken. This is exactly why I would rather have guy friends over girls. Sure you can't talk to guys about EVERYTHING but you also don't have to deal with the constant drama and bickering. My other friend is apparently just too caught up in her relationship. This may sound extremely bitchy but this is my vent session so I'm not caring as of the moment but if it weren't for me she wouldn't even be in this relationship! I introduced them and now I don't exist to her. We make plans almost every night to go out to dinner or go to Dunkin to catch up but when I text or call her, her phone is missing or she just doesn't answer. When we do hang out it's awesome we have so much fun and can't wait to do it again but when "again" is...well that's unknown with her. And of course....writing this all out just made me realize that what she's doing to me...I'm doing to this poor guy. It may be a little different because I really do want to hang out with him I'm just nervous. I can't be vulnerable like that. I'm scared that he's just looking for sex and I'm the stupid girl he could fool into it. But then again..I'm afraid that he's a really good guy and by breaking off plans and not answering texts I'm just losing him..and in that case..he deserves better anyways.

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